Mads....

Its been 15 years since I sang in Madrigals my junior year of high school. The same year I dated my sweetheart. 14 years since I sang in Madrigals my senior year. I never knew back then how much I was going to miss it. Went to the concert tonight. There were some really good moments in there where I cried because I remember how much I missed it. . I miss the music, the people, H. I miss singing everyday really really challenging music and making it sound amazing. I will never have that again in my life. But I am grateful I have my memories. ....and I got a husband out of it too :)

PARTY PARTY PARTY!

Carter's Birthday party was a huge success, tons of fun! We had a family party, then a small just us party after a great baseball game (which they didnt win it was 12-1 but Carter hit the ball and made a great play at pitcher!), and then a friend party and I think all the kids had a great time!

Happy BIrthday Carter!

Nine years ago my life changed forever! Happy Birthday to my son Carter. You have, well, kept life interesting and it has been wonderful to watch you grow up to the boy you are! So unique, so special, and so darn funny! I love you son!

little did we know....2011

So the new year began as any normal new year. resolutions ready to break within the first week...snow starting to finally fall (no thanks to a snowless Christmas) and new health insurance policies signed...what is that you say...a new health insurance high deductible policy.. no worries.. No one will get sick...

Until two weeks later....

Oliver had pink eye...the morning we were to take him in to see a doc, he grabbed the curling iron and burned the majority of his entire right hand. So we took him in. ON top of all that, he had a double ear infection as well. Ugh...it cant get any worse. Well, it did. the Doc gave us meds for his infections, but also referred us to Primary Children's Burn Clinic for his hand. Yup I guess it was that bad. SO we set it all up....I didnt think it could get any worse...and all the while $$ signs are the only thing I can see.



This whole while, I felt like I was having an ache in my stomach, but I didnt think anything of it.

Then....when I awoke with the most horrendous pain right underneath my sternum. It felt like...well, like a gallstone except I dont have a gallbladder anymore! I woke up Kurt thinking something has to be wrong. He, of course, shrugged it off as pulled muscle or something. So I tried ot go back to sleep. The next morning, I sent my son off to school and started to get ready for my day when the pain hit me again!...this time it was worse. I went in the bathroom to get some medicine thinking maybe it was heart burn. When I started to get dizzy, sweaty, ringing in my ears, and I passed out. When I woke up I was on the floor, weak. In pain so scary I didnt know what to do. I could stand. I was shaking. I yelled.."Lizzy. Lizzy!" She came running, "Lizzy get me my phone." When she finally got to me I had crawled to my room from the bathroom. I didnt call Kurt, I called my mom. She didnt hesitate...she was on her way. I then called Kurt. told him I was going to a doctor and I may be headed to the ER. When My mom got here, she was in a panic. I had been able to get myself in to my bed at this point. the pain was wrenching through my abdomen and I had no idea what it could be.

We packed up the kids, and she drove me to the hospital. I was pale as a ghost and felt like I was going to pass out any minute again. I finally got in. A new doc, since our insurance had changed this year, pushed and questioned me. They took some blood samples. I walked, or rather, hunched over in pain slowly forced myself to stumble away from his office with a disappointing diagnosis of "ulcer". I was not convinced. There is no way an ulcer can be this painful.

I took the medicine and did as I was told. That night, the pain came back again, full force. I was crying. I was exhausted. I didnt know what to do. First thing I called the docs office. They were conveniently out of the office so my case was referred to another doc..UGH! So I asked, what do my labs say. I am in pain, this has to be something else! "we will get back with you sometime this afternoon". Meanwhile, I was dying...literally, I didnt know if I could take it. I was nearly headed to the ER for a second opinion. All I could do on top of this all was think about how much this would all cost and who would take care of my family if I had to go back in to the hospital.

Finally, around noon, I got a call. "Your labs are elevated and concerning. You need to come back in and see Dr. **** ", who btw, was a different doctor remember the other guy was on vacation now. So another call to my mom. She was came up. Took me over. This time, i sat there, with pain...he came in..."Well, your lipase is in the 4000s (normal is 300). Something is going on wiht your pancreas. You need to get checked into the hospital ASAP. Stop drinking and eating. You may be ther 4 days or 2 weeks depending on what they find. " WHAT!?

And that was that, $200 to tell me I needed to go to the ER. Thanks doc. So, I called Kurt "well, ready to spend $4000. Im off to the hospital for maybe 2 weeks. "

So he rushed home. We got a sitter for the time being (thanks mom!) and Kurt and I went to the hospital. I got all checked in. That night they ran test after test, MRI, CT, Ultrasound. they could find nothing. I couldnt eat, not even drink water. I was miserable. In pain. and bored.

I rated my pain on this scale....looks like an 8 or 9 to me...LOL!



After 4 days, my levels came down. I was able to start eating slowly again. and they released me without an answer. Since I had no gallbladder, it was not a gallstone. they found no inflammation at the time of CT and MRI. So I was released.

A week later...it returned. I though, oh no...what am I going to do, I will NOT go back there! I cant ask for all the ehlp I got, I cant leave my family again. So they let me be off of food for a day and see if that helped. I was rechecked with my blood work. It was high again, but dropping. So another MRI Was ordered. It was negative. I was sent to a speciliast. They told me to get some enzymes to use when I eat, watch what I eat and if I have a flare up back off and go off foods for a day. So here I am.... feeling better. Worried. But better. AS long as i have no pain, and they cant find anything wrong, I will just go with it.

So finally back into the swing of things, life moved on.

And hey! The Pack won the Superbowl! LOL. It was a great game.

Since then life has been pretty calm. Since our deductible was now met, we decided to get all our elective surgeries done. Oliver got tubes in both ears, no more ear infections. I got elbow surgery for my painful nerves in my arm. Kurt is getting knee surgery in two weeks. So, a blessing in disguise.

March came and went with all the crazy weather. Kurt turned 33. Easter followed.

My birthday was a week or so ago, cant believe Im 32. And here we are.

We look forward to a summer with school almost over, a fence (Yahoo! Kurt is installing it as I speak), Lagoon again, and vacations to the cabin.

I look back and just am amazed at my life, my kids, how fast time moves and in the blink of an eye how fast it could change. I am so grateful for all I have. My friends, most of all my family who never once, NEVER, were not there when I needed help.

So we are basically caught up to now.

Okay, lets continue....

So where did I leave off, oh yes fall 2010...


So school started with hardly any time to prepare. Oliver had his 1st birthday.

After that we prepared for out trip to Disneyland. It was probably the funnest and most stressful vacation I have ever been on. Fun though, really really fun. We drove, so that was an adventure in itself. We stopped over in Vegas and stayed with my Aunt and Uncle there which was so nice! We took the kiddoes to downtown Vegas just so they could see it. It was actually pretty cool. There was a special fall display at the Bellagio that smelled AMAZING! There were giant pumpkins, and herbs, and all sorts of sites that embodied fall and harvest.

Then we headed to Anaheim the next day. We got to the house we were staying at...GORGEOUS! It was built in the early 1900s by a famous movie star critic and gossip columnist who was quite the socialite. This house was 7000 sq ft. Had it all. It was so unique and huge. it has so many rooms. I totally reminded me of a "Clue" mansion. it was amazing! The weather was rainy and foggy so we couldn't enjoy the outdoor pool and hot tub. There were coyotes at night that would surround our yard and hillside and howl at our family dog. There was even a room used as an old speak easy room with hidden passage to escape from the cops. My brother took a gazillion photos, I will try to get those so I can post them.

The next morning we headed to the "big show" and it did not disappoint. It was wonderful, magic, fun, exhausting, and probably the best time I have ever had.

We spent four days there and even one of them we got to pal around with my Best Friend, Alyssa, and her family who were down from Alaska at that same time going on a family trip with their kids to Disneyland. It was perfect.

We also spent one day in San Diego. We wanted to show our kids the beach, but sadly it was pouring rain! but we went anyway. We also went to Old Town, ate at a great Mexican restaurant and then went to the Mormon Battalion museum. It was really neat. I mean Really Neat! The kids loved it too.

After all that fun, we were ready to come home. It was sad to leave. I think about that vacation a lot and cannot wait to go back....but home was calling.

After we got home...Halloween was on its way. It was fun! We did our annual spook alley this time with the help of some of my sisters friends They were fantastic! We got some good scares that year! WE also made a Bowser costume to go along with the theme of Mario. Carter was Bowser, Lizzy was Princess Peach and their two bestest buds were Mario and Luigi. Even Oliver got in on the fun and was Yoshi. It was a lot of fun!

Then the holidays came on us too fast. Thanksgiving and Christmas before we knew it!

With another year over it was time to look to a better year to come....little did we know....

Procrastinating...

Sorry! I made it a promise to write more on here...then I had pancreatitis issues, then I had elbow surgery and couldnt type proper for 6 weeks....and now...well now Im just procrastinating. So consider this site UNDER CONSTRUCTION until I can get back in a good routine.

ok, where did I leave off....

So my last post was last years Christmas update. wow...where to begin.
The year started pretty well. We had our new little guy and life was good.

Unfortunately in April, tragedy struck our family with the loss of Jason's, Kurt's brother's, wife, Jenn. It was the night of Easter. We got a phone call. It was hard to believe. It was completely shocking, difficult, scary, painful, just beyond belief. For me I can say, it has gotten better, but Im sure to Jason the sting is still sharp and hurts more than he will ever tell us. We will always love her. Miss her presence. I should have written in here so that I could express what I felt then. Its hard to remember. I honestly can say I am in a difficult place right now with all of it. But thats my battle. It made me realize how much I love my family. How much I would never do anything to be away from them. It has been something I never thought I would go through. But I did. And I keep going. As Lizzy so innocently told me "We will see her again someday mommy" and I know we will.

With a new zest for being alive and being with the ones I love. Making each moment count, we headed into the summer. Carter turned 8 and he was baptized. It was another step in my life. Another awakening of what really matters. It was really special to have his friends see it. I have noticed a change in him. A better love of the gospel. A better understanding. He is so bright. Love that boy. I am so proud of him. He continues to show his compassion and friendship to everyone.

On to the summer...this is where I finally have pictures to show. It was a hot one too. May and June flew by and then we hit July...ugh! So we escaped to the cabin...as usual. Our most favorite place in the whole world. We did the usual, relaxed, floated the river, went to Yellowstone. There is nothing like it in the world to be up there.

The next event of note was GEEX 2010. Kurt and some buddies at work love to game. So they brought back GEEX 2010 through their work and headed the entire project along with a GEEX podcast. It was a success. I wont bore you with the details, but it was pretty much like COMICON but with video games and on a much much smaller scale. THis year will be even bigger.


Lizzy then celebrated her 5th Birthday. She had a Mario Party and shared the party with her "boyfriend" Bradley who lives next door and who's birthday is only 2 days after hers.

The rest of the summer was busy and fun. we went camping twice. Once with family and once with friends. I will NEVER go camping again with a 8 month old! But lessen learned. Here are some pics of random fun throughout the summer with friends.

We headed into the next school year with high hopes. Carter was so excited for 3rd grade THIRD GRADE!!! and Lizzy started PRESCHOOL! They are getting so big!

They LOVE school and so do I. It has made Carter such a good kid and Lizzy is quite the socialite.

In September, Oliver celebrated his 1st Birthday! He is our little ginger! The only one of his kind, he is silly, fun, crazy, we just love him. How could you not!

Then fall came and the time we had all been waiting for was about to happen. We were going to Disneyland!